Emotions in the Workplace

As a follow-up to my recent post, How to Respond When Children Get Emotional. I think it is important to discuss emotions as they pertain to us as adults. After all, if we do not act emotionally intelligent, it will be hard to help our children understand and learn from their own emotions.

15 signs that you are emotionally intelligent (HuffPost)

As I mentioned in my earlier post, feeling and processing emotions is a normal and natural part of the human experience. Understanding our emotions (joy, anger, anticipation, contempt, etc.), can help inform our choices and cultivate growth. Showing emotion is not a bad thing unless we let our emotions take over.

If an incident in the office causes your blood pressure to rise, it may cause you to lose your temper and lash out at your co-worker. Instead, you could ask yourself, “What do I need right now?” Perhaps you need to take a five-minute walk to cool down. Or you could tell your co-worker, “I’m feeling frustrated right now.” Then you invite them to have a two-way conversation. In opening up the conversation, you and your colleague can find a solution together.

Showing emotions in the workplace is not a bad thing, as long as they don’t control or cripple you. For example, crying out of self-pity at the office is silly. If you feel yourself tearing up, allow a few tears and then take time to listen to yourself and explore that feeling, “Why am I crying? What do I need? How can I learn from this and move on?” Learn from your emotions and allow them to be part of what guides you in your decision-making. Emotions should empower us, not hold us back.

As Dr. John Gottman points out, emotional intelligence is often a better predictor of workplace success and life fulfillment than IQ. Take a moment to reflect on a situation where you felt emotional at work. How did you respond? What did your emotions tell you?